sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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