i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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