one might say we're banned from that church
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize