Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Dear god my vagina.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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