you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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