Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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