3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
