So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Randomize
