he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
