So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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