First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
