That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
