so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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