i just wanna soil my oats bro
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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