god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
