I've blown a few things in my day
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
