Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Randomize
