Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
