Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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