the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize