I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
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