don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i dont even know how to be here
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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