My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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