it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
