Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.

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(301): View more from Maryland

I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.

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(817): View more from Texas

I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.

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(516): View more from New York

He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue

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(304): View more from West Virginia

will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?

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(206): View more from Washington

Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.

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(417): View more from Missouri

He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.

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(540): View more from Virginia

After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"

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