Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
