your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
