He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
