I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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