i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
