Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
