apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize