Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
