i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
