she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
