Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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