So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
