Whats the glycemic index on semen?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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