I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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