I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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