Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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