Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Floor bacon is actually really good
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
