Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
