I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize