why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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