im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
no you cant smoke seaweed
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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