I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
