living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Randomize
