I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
