I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
