it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
